I have a sleep app on my cell phone. Punch in the alarm(s) you need to wake, tell it how much you need as an ideal night of slumber, it will tell you when to go to bed. Not as in figuring the time, but as a reminder that comes up and tells me I need to be in bed in 15 minutes if I want to achieve my sleep goal, which is 8.5 hours for me. I could go with much more, I need it. There are studies that prove you can, in fact, catch up on lost sleep. Right now I’m thinking about 5 months straight sleeping might catch me up!
Today was day 5 of 21 (I miscounted and thought it was 23) working days in a row. Yes, I am crazy but that isn’t news to some of my readers (you know who you are and I know you read my blog, there are no secrets). Currently I have 2 full time jobs because one is close to home and the other pays better. The one paying better doesn’t have over time, the one close to home does but I have no time to pick up that OT because I work all 7 days of the week. On day 22 I am off from both jobs, and after I watch 2 of the grandsnugglers I will be coming home to study my butt off so it isn’t really much of what one would refer to as a day off.
I have 20 days of studying before the big state exam, and I’m trying to do that on the days I work until 2pm. Come home, shower off (because yes I DO have a clue what is on me and the uniform and we don’t care to go there), hit the bedroom with the 2, 4 inch binders full of study material and the textbook I found online. I will pass this exam and be certified to pass medications. And my pay jumps $1 per hour at the job close to home, and $4 per hour at the other. I see myself getting out of debt Dave Ramsey style!
My phone tells me what time to get up each day, 4:20am for the job close to home, 4am for the other. It tells me how many steps I log per day (over 20K), reminds me if it is someone’s birthday, allows me to do everything my laptop does, and then some. I could even write blog posts if I could find time to actually sit down and do it on the phone.
Right now I’m sitting on my bed, sipping a glass of wine, waiting for that “hey, if you really want to be awake tomorrow it is time to go to bed” reminder.
One thing I really need to keep me sane right now is my faith. I’m really concerned about that of late. Oh, I believe with all of my heart, that Christ is my Savior. But I’ve lost my desire for the Word of God. I enjoy it, need it, but lack the discipline to set aside the time to be IN the Word daily. And because of my hectic schedule I’ve not made it to church in a number of weeks. While watching online is great, it is not a substitute for the hugs and sharing with in-person connections. I’m also becoming too much of a home body, hermiting in my shell and not really interested in the whole going out thing. Too much work. I even found a small group from church of other women in their 50s who are single/divorced and last night I was too exhausted to make it to the gathering, and even forgot it was Wednesday night at all. Outside of my Divas the most meaningful conversation I have had of late was with my stylist, it consisted of discussion of how short to cut the locks, which was very short, and the benefits of regrowth when it comes to a great looking style. Yep, that was a deep one right there. Something has got to give here. Thankfully at the end of October I’m going to Woman Camp with the women from church and that will help refresh the body, mind and soul.
The funny thing about it all? I’m happy! Last night I made the comment to my mom that I love my life, it is so good. I work with some badass women who get it done, live with some equally badass women who are very supportive and loving, have terrific kids and grandkids, and at the end of the day I know I am blessed beyond measure, and feel so accomplished. I know, this is all just one chapter and soon the page will flip and things will be different. I just need to hang in here…and get some sleep.
On that note, I think it is time for a bit more wine, put my air plants back (they are drying from having a bath), and then go find the Sandman.